Why is it when my EF draws a picture of my "male area" it's as big as Texas, but my wife's rendition is R.I.?

Eddie, that's an "easy" one! The drawing by your EF is what she perceives you as being, the drawing by your wife is what she KNOWS you as being. Sorry to be so brutally honest, but sometimes the truth hurts! And, I wouldn't mean to hurt you for all the tea in China...:)