I went(lightly) throu my gf phone and seen some flirting texts?

Let her go. Let her do her thing. you need to back off. Because right now, shes in the wrong. Not you. You are sure of what you want and her on the other hand, seems to be a but confused let her be ad figure it out. put 0 effort in. When she figures it out, shell tell you. Do not show that your willing to be walked over.